23 September 2012

Dealing With Negative People

Last night I couldn't sleep, normally I would be worrying about petty little things. Maybe how people are treating me, maybe how life is going, maybe about everything that's gone wrong in my life etc... but not last night. I lay awake, thinking of all the great things that have happened in my life and how blessed I am to have it. I wanted to share my experience and how I overcame these sorrows, I know I wasn't the only one feeling this way... 

Since doing Youtube/Blogging, I noticed how how people would comment on my life, how great it was, how perfect it seems but little did they know, it couldn't be more further than the truth. I too had to deal with negative people around me. Time after time, I would break down into tears and question myself until one day I snapped out of it. I stopped listening to the negativity and smiled because I have a great life right now, it was a shame it took me so long to realise how unhappy I was becoming, because of other people's problems, I realised that I wasn't the problem, THEY are the problem. 

Who is spreading the negativity?

Identify who is giving you negativity. Do you understand why this person is being negative? Is it because they hate their job, feel frustrated, feel trapped in their life or do they lack in self esteem so the only way they can feel powerful is by hurting others? If you understand why they are being like that, then it's much more easier to deal with.  If it's a so-called friend, confront them. Maybe they have insecurities themselves, they may be unaware that they are being so negative. If the negativity continues, move on and find new friends. They obviously have no concern over your feelings. 
If it's someone closer i.e a family member, confront them also. This can be hard as no matter what, you are attached to this person. Negativity within a family normally stems from rivalry, deeper insecurities and overall self assessment. Sit down and talk about it, it's worth figuring it out but if it's still not working and all you end up doing is arguing? I deal with this far too much, just ignore it, there's nothing more you can do. 




DEAL WITH IT!

Whenever the negativity starts, smile and remain silent. Negative people crave and feed on attention, don't get trapped in their bubble of negativity, don't let them drain your energy, don't let them bring you down. Say to yourself, "what a shame this person is so unhappy. Maybe some of my positive energy will rub off on them". Detach yourself from the situation, step outside the bubble and observe it. Some people have no idea how negative they have become. 

Remember that the negative behaviour is a reflection of them. It tells you what kind of person they are and what issues they may be dealing with. It's not a reflection of who you are. Rise above it. 




Its not your fault, focus on YOUR own positive energy

Its not your fault, don't believe a thing when they are trying to belittle you, trying hard to make you feel worthless. Sit up straight, take a deep breath and snap out of it. Be enthusiastic about what's happening in your life right now. I was often called 'fake' because when things were getting me down, I often smiled and brushed it off, concentrating on the positive stuff so obviously the negative person didn't understand why I was being so positive and happy when there were these problems floating around. Of course, negative people won't want to see you happy hence trying to bring you down again by judging.  Do not question yourself nor take in what negative things have been said, remember, you're great, you're doing no harm and most of all, you're just trying to lead a happy life. You're own happiness is in your hands, enjoy it!




If all else fails, reduce contact with them or avoid them altogether. It’s not healthy to spend too much time with people who drain you. Your time is precious, so spend it with people who have positive effects on you. There is so much to do, so much to see and so much to experience in your life. So brush off the negative comments and live your life the way you want to. 


Smile Today, Smile Tomorrow, Smile Forever

             




Be certain of who you are, what you believe in and what you want out of life and most importantly don't let the negative comments ruin your day, remember, THEY are having a shit day, not you. It's going to be hard not to snap back at them but remain calm and keep a clear head. It took me years to figure this out, I am glad I finally did. Life has never been happier.



(Images: Google)

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20 comments

  1. This is very helpful! I needed it! Was thinking of starting youtube too, so its given me some thought! x

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  2. Yay! Those who chose to do something healthy with their knowledge like share it with others should be proud (like you). Never let negative people get you down. Great post Suzi, very uplifting :)

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  3. This post saved me today at the right timing. I found relief because of reading this post. I will lift my head high and try to ignore the negative people around me from today on. It will do me no good to fall into their negativity traps. Thank you so much, Suzi!! =D

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  4. The hardest thing to do it not care about how other people behave.

    /Avy

    http://mymotherfuckedmickjagger.blogspot.com

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  5. This post was great. thanks for being so enlightening. I will try to keep my chin up and think positive :)

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  6. success make bad people envious. Don`t think about it, be always honest and good to you and other people, live your life as you want without hurting others, and if you have that success, you can be proud of you because you have worked for that.
    Don`t listen to negative people, listen to the positive quys! ^_^
    Lovely post my dear!
    Yuna

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  7. This is a beautiful post suzi. Truly. Sometimes it is hard to not let other people influence your mood and feelings. The only real solution is to know, truly know how you are feeling and not let other people dictate how you should be feeling. :)

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  8. I love how this post focuses on negativity in a positive light. Negativity is a part of life, and everything that we get from it helps to make us a part of who we are today

    Thanks Suzi

    jayj x.
    avecjayj.blogspot.com.

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  9. What a wonderful post and words <3

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  10. Definitely made my day reading this :) such a wonderful perspective Suzi xx

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  11. Post like these are always nice to read, so THANK YOU :)

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  12. Exactly what I needed, Thank you :)

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  13. Thanks for writing about this matter :) It was a good thing to actually read about it like this.. I've been thinking about same things for a while now. The first pic in your post is the one that can pretty much summarize my thoughts lately :c And it's especially hard, when those negative ppl are part of your family and you can't really get rid off them :s It's also hard to ignore their nagativity.. so I'm a bit lost :c

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  14. Thank you Suzi..really thank you..Hearing that from you is a big deal..And you made me realize that i really really needed that..I will try to think what you wrote just now,every day!
    Thank you Suzi!

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  15. I totally agree with this post, it's something that really rings true for me at the moment. I am quite a sensitive person so can really take things to heart. Recently I have (unfortunately) had to deal with several negative people who are just generally trying to make things difficult for me, in my personal life/relationship ( I mean come on, have you really not got anything better to do? :/) and trying to get under my skin. It used to really get to me, but I am trying to you brush it off - like you said, their personal problems/own negativity is not your problem:) let them simmer in their own hate and spitefulness! Be positive in everything you do, and believe me, things will only get better for you. It really is true! X

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  16. such a great post, thanks suzi!

    9heads.blogspot.com

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  17. this will keep be motivated and positive!
    x

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  18. Hi Suzi..very inspirational. Do you go to church? I found that the Bible has EVERYTHING on being positive like love, peace, joy, contentment, forgiveness, mercy and truth. The Lord bless you~ :)

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